Dear Friends,
In keeping with my promise of a three-part blog on this subject, we will take a look at the church wedding. You may visit the blog archives to refresh on the first part…
Highly expectant, we arrived in good time, the church premises where the program for the solemnization of holy matrimony uniting Audrey Obioma Ohaeri and Chibuikem Nwabugwu Onuzo took place. Invited guests, friends and family from around Ghana, Nigeria, and other parts of the world had started gathering. The serene atmosphere of the church and its bespoke architectural design added to the joy and glamour in the air. Christ the King Catholic Church, Cantonments, Accra, is finely appointed as most orthodox church buildings are. Built within the choicest part of the city and as a place of worship from inception, it had all the accoutrements of a hallowed ground, inspiring the image of God and heavenly angels on the faithful….
Dotted Lines.....
However, besides the glamour and frenzy of activity, I was enthralled most of all by the message preached by the Very Reverend Fr. Andrew Campbell SVD. Though white, he preached from the heart, as one who has lived in and understood the black and African milieu. The sermon, ‘Five Love Languages’ drawn largely from a book of the same title, was delivered with both candor and comic interjections that helped in no small measures to blunt the hard truth contained therein.
So what are the Five Love Languages, or if you will, Five Languages of Love? These do not necessarily consist of words, but includes a set of actions and attitudes. Here are they, with some of my own revelations; and my prayer is that you will imbibe them for a more fruitful relationship.
1 Words of Affirmation: Your spouse needs to hear such affirmative words as ‘I love you’, ‘thank you’, etc. Be generous in vocal expressions of your love and appreciation.
2 Quality Time Together: Sometimes, it is necessary to put off all the phones, television, and such distractive gadgets of modern life and face each other, ‘eye ball to eye ball’. Take out time to do things together, hold a conversation, ‘talk from the heart, and not from the mouth’.
3 Receiving and Giving Gifts: For the small things, surprises, anniversary, birthdays etc. Everyone loves a gift much more so from or to your spouse! It is the oil that keeps the relationship engine running without wear and tear.
4 Ask for Acts of Service: ‘What can I do for you?’; ‘Can I help?’ Most relationships have been destroyed by a code of silence from either of the parties, by not asking for help when needed. Don’t presume your spouse should know and do what is required; and then break into anger and rejection, if they don’t.
5 Physically Touch: Do things together, keep each other company, don’t be afraid to touch your spouse. After all, you have become one flesh, and this mystery must be fulfilled for your marriage relationship to work.
Perceptibly a man with a large heart, Rev. Campbell added a sixth language, and perhaps the most important in any marriage relationship: The Family That Prays Together, Stays Together. Whatever you need, ask together in faith.
With Rev.Campbell
And finally, to summarize the languages of love, he coined a phrase and accompanying acronym: ‘See How Much I Love You’ (SHMILY). Imprint it on a card at the bedside table or dining table, recite it as often as you can, but your spouse needs to see and hear how much you love them! SHMILY! – It’s the tonic of love!
P/S: In Part Three, we will take a look at the wedding reception and the uniqueness of the couple. Keep a date with me.
And finally, to summarize the languages of love, he coined a phrase and accompanying acronym: ‘See How Much I Love You’ (SHMILY). Imprint it on a card at the bedside table or dining table, recite it as often as you can, but your spouse needs to see and hear how much you love them! SHMILY! – It’s the tonic of love!
P/S: In Part Three, we will take a look at the wedding reception and the uniqueness of the couple. Keep a date with me.
Last Line: Prayer can move mountains, and there is a God that answers prayers. Mathew 18:18-20 NIV: ”I tell you the truth, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them." God is able and available to answer your prayers. Ask now!
